Monday, December 31, 2012

New Year's Resolutions: The Restore to Factory Settings Button

January 1 is like fresh snow, like a clean sheet of paper.  So much hope, so much promise, so much beauty, just lying there, waiting!

Inspired, we take a deep breath and begin our journey. 

Things go okay for a while. Proceed with caution, our inner voice says. Be mindful. We stamp evenly spaced footprints in the snow.  Our words start to flow.  We continue, gaining confidence, relying upon the skills, habits and experiences in our personal arsenal.  $#@%! We've made an “n” instead of an “m” and in trying to correct it wind up with an ugly lump of tar on our paper.  Some disgusting misfit of humanity has left his dog’s mess right there for decent people to step in and ruin our new shoes.

Forget it!  Crumple up the paper and toss it in the trash. Turn around and stomp on home. Self-medicate by over doing something that will only make us feel worse.  

What we really want on January 1 is a “RESTORE TO FACTORY SETTINGS” button for humans.    

And why not?  Wouldn’t it be fun if we could start from scratch every January 1, and every September too, which some of us regard as New Year’s lite?  If we could erase all the misinformed crap that has gotten us to our “mistakes?”  If at least to some extent we could reprogram the genes that might predestine certain behaviors or flaws?

But then we wouldn't be who we are.  Mistakes are what make us unique.  Perfection is overrated.  Some “mistakes” are part and parcel with gifts.  Think of the the messy person who is always improvising and thinking of new approaches to a problem.  The perfectionist on whom you can count to do things right.  

So with that in mind, here are the bugs I’d get rid on myself of if I had a factory reset button. Some things are reasonably easy fixes. Some are doable with a lot of focus and forgiveness.  Some would be tough, but worth it.  Some might make a better me, while also making me an insufferable, unrecognizable Stepford wife Pollyanna nightmare -- the type of person EVERYONE would wanna give a bitch slap.

Anyhoo, here's my list:

  1. Eat better  - both more regularly and healthy food consistently, i.e., not be a kale, quinoa, sweet potato salad kinda gal one day, and a gummy bears and popcorn gal  the next.  Yes, I am a severely bipolar eater.
  2. Go to bed at a decent hour.
  3. Organize my time better so I am not always rushing, or late, and making my family crazy.
  4. Become less volatile.
  5. Live more in the present.
  6. Take more dance classes (Pirouettes, I’m comin’ to getcha!)
  7. Not beat myself up like crazy in dance classes!
  8. Get this blog to take off.
  9. Have a clean house.
  10. Stop seeing my checkbook as a bottomless pit/mystery machine. 
  11. Remember that though I may blog, my life offline is what matters.
  12. Read more.  Offline.  Actual books.
  13. Stop caring so much what people think.  Both negative comments on the blog and from assholes in the flesh.
  14. Realize that being polite doesn't mean being uncomfortable or taking crap.  
  15. Giving myself a break and accepting who I am.  (Hmmmm. Does that negate some of this list?)
  16. Drink more water.
  17. Be more of a roll-with-the-punches kind of gal.
  18. Taking back the power from assholes, whether that means keeping my mouth shut or speaking up.  
  19. Remember (thank you Sheryl Crow) that it's not getting what you want, it's wanting what you want.  Stop being an expert at "Compare and Despair."
  20. Be a more consistent disciplinarian.  Take a deep breath. Count to 10. No more yelling.
  21. Volunteering
  22.  Spend more time planning classes.
  23.  Better meal planning - avoid daily forays to HP Produce and Trader Joes
  24.  Sit down more at home to read or even watch TV – without any Apple device near me.
  25. Did I say I would have a clean house?  You'll agree that I need work in this department!  Check the post-playdate carnage at my friend Anna's blog, My Life and Kids!

I know I can't do all of these. But, I can do some of these at least some of the time.

And that might have to do.  

Mom’s New Stage wishes you abounding success in your quest to better yourself whether that means New Year's resolutions or not!  Celebrate small victories.  And remember this word. 



  1. Replies
    1. You too, lady! I can feel it. This is the year I so totally get my own denim line at Family Dollar!

  2. For me #2 and #11 go hand in hand. Both resolutions for me this year too. Happy New Year!

    1. You are so right, Ilana! Happy New Year to you and your beautiful family!

  3. I hear you on so many of these things! I really appreciated #11 b/c I struggle with blogging balance, but your whole list could have been mine. And you nailed it--"perspective" is really what it all comes down to. Here's hoping you start off to a great 2013!

  4. I could just copy this list, except for the dance classes. :) Ellen

    1. Glad to know we all want to change the same things. Or should we just agree to say #@$% it and move on with our lives?

  5. Great list of resets! Reading actual books?! Woohoo!

    I'd say don't worry about #23 (better meal planning). Remember that they have really tiny refrigerators in they go to the market all the time.

    Happy New Year!


    1. I used to read books avidly and now that I blog, I am lucky to get through my New Yorker.

      So right about marketing - not the biggest deal in the world - but I could use the extra 30-45 minutes or so on other things! Like sitting!

      Happy New Year to you too!


Related Posts Plugin for WordPress, Blogger...